I might be miserable. I’m worried about my weight. My heart. My hormones. How many antioxidants I’m eating. Am I getting enough calcium? Fiber? Protein?
I worry and I ponder and I fret and I make plans, plans in my head. Then I forget and I eat a whole bag of tortilla chips. And some margaritas. And some ice cream and some macaroons and some wine and some trail mix.
And then I eat a veggie sandwich. And I like it. And I think... maybe.
I work out and I join boot camp and I kick ass. I do pushups and situps and mountain climbers. I run.
And then I sit on my ass. I slump in front of the computer. I read weight loss blogs. I think about doing something. I plan. I plan in my head. But I sit.
I think about being the kind of person who eats only organic. Vegan. No hormones. No sugar. No dairy. Nothing fried. Only complex carbohydrates. Virtuous.
Then I eat some nachos.
I am conflicted. Sometimes I think I'm crazy. I'm confused.
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One woman's quest to eat right, work out, love myself, and lose some weight in the process.
About Me
- Future Me
- I'm 29 and I've been overweight my entire life. I've lost and gained more pounds than I can count. This time I'm focusing on getting fit and becoming the person I want to be. I'm ready to become my future me.
Good Reads
- Amy's Quest to Skinny
- Angie All The Way
- Angry Fat Girlz
- Aprovechar
- Back in Skinny Jeans
- Bitch Cakes
- Dearest Mabel
- DietGirl
- Du Wax Loolu
- Escape From Obesity
- Fantastically Blonde
- Fat Bridesmaid
- Fat For Now
- Fatinah - My Life: Part Deux
- Fig
- Fit Bottomed Girls
- Funnymoods
- Grumpy Snickles
- Half of Me
- Hot Thick Chick
- Just Another Weigh
- Kim Under Construction
- Petite Flower
- Pink Bunny Foo Foo
- Snackie's World
- Square One
- Weight and Paint
- Weight of My World
4 comments:
Oh Jen, you and I are so alike! I totally, totally, totally get this post. It scares me how much of my thoughts and energy are wrapped up in health/weight loss/ fitness. Honestly, some people have hobbies or interests. I have an obsession with Fat.
I don't know, I guess I feel conflicted, crazy, and confused so much of the time too. Like today. I tried to convince myself to workout. Instead I ate half a rack of barbecue ribs and a side of fries. Then I feel so guilty so I try to read fat blogs to be inspired or at least to distract myself until I get refocused. Yet even as I'm sitting here I'm thinking about the closest cold stone to my house. It just sucks.
Uhuh.
Although I'm not sure what trail mix is.
I know what you mean. I have an amazing ability to be virtuous for several days, then say "but not today" when things get stressful or busy.
Is it me, or has being vegetarian gone out of fashion? Seems like everyone is either vegan, or eats meat...
I so get what you're talking about! Especially the "sitting in front of the computer and reading weight loss blogs and making plans in my head" thing... Right now, I'm good but I know it can change as quickly as that. Hang in there.
Who gave you the keys to my brain?! Scary how much we're like! Just catching up with your postings since returning from vacation and wanted to say hello!
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