Love

Wow. July 4th on a Wednesday? Not a big fan. Today felt like a Monday all over again. But at least tomorrow's Friday, so it's all good.. We're dog sitting for my parents right now, and the dog is just ridiculously sad and misses my mom so much. She's just precious and cute, but really whiny. And pretty darn spoiled. Unfortunately I'm not getting a lot of sleep right now, because she wakes up twenty million times a night looking for my mom.

So between that, and the beers and the chips yesterday, I woke up today feeling icky poo poo, as Perez would say. I was dreading my group run tonight, but it actually went fairly well. We did our warm ups, and then 3 sets of 15 minutes each, with 6 sets of 15 second strides. The last 15 minute set was a little rough and I had to walk a tiny bit up one of the hills, but I made it. A girl in my group said we did about 5 miles total, including the warm up, so I'm pretty excited about that.

I've now done 5 mile runs twice in the past week! Wow, I have got to say that I really rock. I also did a 16 mile bike ride yesterday, so hopefully that helped offset the crazy amount of food I ate at my friend's BBQ yesterday. Still need to work on that part, but I got back on track today so that's all good.

The boy and I had a big talk last night about how I approach food when it comes to social events. It's like when I get to a party, or a social gathering, or even just dinner with friends, all of the sudden my knowledge of nutrition and my ability to make good choices just flies out the window. I think I use food to compensate for some level of social unease. It's like if I just hover by the chips and dip, I won't have to mingle and wonder if anyone wants to talk to me. I never consciously think that when I'm at a party, but for some reason it always tends to happen.

So I'm going to try to work on that, and I'm going to try to work on the guilt thing that takes control of me if I do end up straying from my plan a bit. Negative self-talk is killing me, and I just can't do it anymore. I need to love myself. And it starts now!