Thursday, July 05, 2007


Wow. July 4th on a Wednesday? Not a big fan. Today felt like a Monday all over again. But at least tomorrow's Friday, so it's all good.. We're dog sitting for my parents right now, and the dog is just ridiculously sad and misses my mom so much. She's just precious and cute, but really whiny. And pretty darn spoiled. Unfortunately I'm not getting a lot of sleep right now, because she wakes up twenty million times a night looking for my mom.

So between that, and the beers and the chips yesterday, I woke up today feeling icky poo poo, as Perez would say. I was dreading my group run tonight, but it actually went fairly well. We did our warm ups, and then 3 sets of 15 minutes each, with 6 sets of 15 second strides. The last 15 minute set was a little rough and I had to walk a tiny bit up one of the hills, but I made it. A girl in my group said we did about 5 miles total, including the warm up, so I'm pretty excited about that.

I've now done 5 mile runs twice in the past week! Wow, I have got to say that I really rock. I also did a 16 mile bike ride yesterday, so hopefully that helped offset the crazy amount of food I ate at my friend's BBQ yesterday. Still need to work on that part, but I got back on track today so that's all good.

The boy and I had a big talk last night about how I approach food when it comes to social events. It's like when I get to a party, or a social gathering, or even just dinner with friends, all of the sudden my knowledge of nutrition and my ability to make good choices just flies out the window. I think I use food to compensate for some level of social unease. It's like if I just hover by the chips and dip, I won't have to mingle and wonder if anyone wants to talk to me. I never consciously think that when I'm at a party, but for some reason it always tends to happen.

So I'm going to try to work on that, and I'm going to try to work on the guilt thing that takes control of me if I do end up straying from my plan a bit. Negative self-talk is killing me, and I just can't do it anymore. I need to love myself. And it starts now!


Alea said...

I agree with you Jeni - you so rock! Way to go for the 5 mile runs and the bike ride!

Your description of your approach to food in social situations sounds very familiar... Thoughts that run through my head in situations like that go from "I shouldn't be eating this here where everyone can see me. They'll all think 'No wonder she's that fat!'" to "I need to eat this. If I don't eat anything they'll think I'm on a diet and I don't want them to know!". Guess I'm pretty screwed that way, huh?

Good on you for acknowledging the pattern though. Now you can work on it and try to do better.

Kim said...

Awesome job on the run!! WOOHOOO!!

You're right about needing to treat yourself better by showing you a little love!! All too often we tend to be our own worst enemies. I don't know why that is, but I know that it is something that I am working on daily with myself. :(

You are headed in the right direction girl!! Just keep moving. :)

Kim said...

Hey Jeni - I just wanted to check in with you to see if you are still interested in joining our little 12 week challenge. Today is the first day and I just wanted to make sure to put you on one of the teams if you still wanted to play. Let me know. :)