Monday, May 29, 2006

Long Weekends

Are so great. Why do we have to work again? Sucky. This was a great weekend though. Saturday I took a rest day, but had a great eating day and stayed under 1200 calories. Sunday the boy and I went on a long ride.

We started out planning to go from Confluence Park (downtown Denver) to Chatfield reservoir. It's about 40 miles round-trip, but I was pumped and feeling ready to go. Well, somehow we turned off the path that goes along the river to the reservoir and ended up going west. We ended up going all the way to Morrison Road and climbing partway into the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. The ride was perfect. The scenery was beautiful and I was feeling good. We only rode about 32 miles, but the I think the climb on the way there made up for the lack of mileage. The boy even noted I didn't ever get snippy, which is what I tend to do when I'm tired and out of energy on a ride.

Including rest time for a banana once we hit Morrison Road, the ride took about 2 and a half hours. I burned over 1300 calories and averaged around 14 miles per hour. Awesome. We got home and made lunch and then took the best nap ever. We deserved it. After that, it was over to some friends house for pizza and wine. I ended up consuming way too many calories for my liking, but I guess it's what my body needed after that ride.

After a great night's sleep, I woke up this morning rejuvenated. Went out for a run planning to do the 3 mile loop I can finally do without stopping, but by the time I got back I felt okay so I decided to keep going. I ended up running almost 4 miles in 46 minutes. I'm not exactly sure of the mileage (I need to get the foot pod that goes with my heart rate monitor!) but I know it was close to four miles. Awesome again!

Got back and the boy and I took the dog on a walk and then chillaxed for the rest of the day. So remind me again why I have to go back to work? Because a girl could really get used to this.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Meltdown

I had a slight emotional meltdown last night. I won't go in to the details, but it wasn't good. I think I was just tired and relieved to have the boy home and pissed at myself for having popcorn at the movies and french fries at dinner. Feh. Also, I think "that time of the month" might have a little something to do with it. We had a long talk though, and I'm feeling better about myself and the things that I want. I mean I guess I've always known at some level what I want, but I haven't always been able to do what it takes to get there.

Today we went to the grocery store and stocked up on healthy foods, and we have a plan to stop eating out so much. I've been trying to lose weight pretty much ever since I've known him, and he's always been supportive, but I've always felt like this is something I should be able to do on my own. I think I'm finally realizing that I need help and I need as much support as I can possibly get. If I'm feeling weak or vulnerable, I can turn to him and ask for help. It's okay. It really is.

So tomorrow the plan is go on a long bike ride and make some yummy meals out of all the food we bought. I'll let you know how it goes. :)

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Pasta with Herbed Goat Cheese and Cherry Tomatoes

I found it! I highly recommend this; it's delicious. Probably not a good meal if you're looking for a ton of protein, but delicious nonetheless.

Pasta with Herbed Goat Cheese and Cherry Tomatoes

12 ounces uncooked angel hair pasta
6 tablespoons (3 ounces) garlic and herb-flavored goat cheese
1/3 cup chopped fresh basil
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 1/2 teaspoons bottled minced garlic
2 cups grape or cherry tomatoes, halved (about 1 pint)
2/3 cup fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth

Cook pasta according to package directions, omitting salt and fat. Drain; place in a large bowl. Add goat cheese, basil, salt, and pepper to pasta; stir until well blended.

While pasta cooks, heat oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add garlic; sauté 30 seconds. Add tomatoes; cook 2 minutes, stirring frequently. Add broth; cook 1 minute. Add tomato mixture to pasta mixture; toss gently to combine.

Yield: 4 servings (serving size: about 1 1/2 cups)

NUTRITION PER SERVING
CALORIES 372(28% from fat); FAT 11.5g (sat 4.9g,mono 4g,poly 0.6g); PROTEIN 16.5g; CHOLESTEROL 17mg; CALCIUM 75mg; SODIUM 627mg; FIBER 2.5g; IRON 3.1mg; CARBOHYDRATE 51.8g

May Places

Hey everyone. I finally went back to the gym tonight after taking a week off due to sickness and laziness and it felt awesome. I hate weight lifting, but I know how good it is for my body and I can just feel my muscles growing. And even though I've taken time off from lifting, I've still been out on my bike and doing my runs, so all is well.

Now if I could only get my food in order. As usual all of my good intentions go to hell. I went to my mom's for dinner last night, and what does she have? Chips and guac. Damn it! Oh well, that's the way life goes. I did do a half hour run before the chips and guac, so hopefully that offset the damage a little.

Tomorrow I have to go to the gyno, and I am not looking forward to it. The biggest reason is that I'm going to get weighed once again, and once again I'll be showing a number that I've seen for at least the past three years. Over those years I've gotten up to 15 pounds lower than I am now, but I always go back up. This has got to stop happening. It will stop happening. Next May I will be in a new place.

I guess I am in a new place this May, but it's just not showing up on the scale. I mean I rode my bike to work last week! I never would have considered that last May. In fact, I rode my bike to work, then rode my bike straight to Whole Foods, where I picked up veggies and ingredients for dinner, then came home and cooked a recipe from Cooking L1ght. Now if you know me, you know that would never happen. So things are good.

P.S. I can't find the recipe right now but I will post when I can. It was awesome thought, I must say.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Sicky But Feeling Good

If that title makes sense. I know it doesn't, but that's okay.

Sorry I haven't been by in so long. Unfortunately I'm a little sick. Not stomach sick, but I have a cold. Let's see, it started on Sunday, and I think I pushed it that day because I went on a two hour bike ride and my immune system must not have been up for it. After that I started coughing, sneezing, and just generally feeling like ick. Then I helped my mom plant flowers all day and I think that did me in.

Anyway, I'm taking some time off from exercise and trying to get lots of sleep so this goes away quickly, and I think it's working. I've also been using this as a chance to get my shit back together with eating and keep my calories low. I've been reading a bunch of blogs over the past two days, and I think I really need to focus on keeping my calories low during the week. I'm doing well right now, so let's see if I can keep it up.

The boy is out of town right now and will be until next Friday, (he's in Singapore, wow, I hope he brings me something fun!) so I have plenty of time to myself to focus on what I need to do. I think I'll take one more day off of working out to ensure I can breathe when I get back to it, and then I'll really dive back in from Thursday - Sunday. Or maybe I'll go tomorrow. I get so antsy, I'm not sure if I can handle three days off in a row.

Also, I'm hosting girl's night/TV Watching club at my house tomorrow. I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's just a chance for us to get together and we're all too lazy to actually read a book and talk about it, so TV watching it is. It's tough because there is always wine involved, and appetizers, and dessert. I'm hosting, so it means I'm doing my best to be healthy, but I also want everyone to enjoy themselves at my house. I'm having green olives with hummus and crackers for snacks while dinner is being made, then the main course is angel hair marinara with zuchinni and spinach. It's easy, cheap, and something pretty much everyone should like. For dessert I got lowfat big coffee chain popsicles. Should be pretty good overall. Now if I can just avoid the wine.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Barf

Has anyone ever puked from working out? I bet some of those crazy tri people whose blogs I read have. I think I almost did tonight.

Went to see the trainer tonight and he kicked my ass. At the time I didn't think it was really any tougher than any other week, just a good hard workout. According to my heart rate monitor I burned about 560 calories, which is quite a lot for a 60 minute weight lifting session. I cooled off in the locker room, but as I was walking up the stairs to go to my car my heart rate shot back up and and I got nauseous. I mean really nauseous. The whole drive home I just stayed in the right lane so I could pull over and barf if I needed to. Sorry if that's too much information, but it's just weird.

The feeling seems to have passed, but I'm still not 100%. I had a banana with peanut butter because that was all I could really stomach and I needed some protein after that workout. I think that'll have to do for dinner tonight. It worries me a little because I usually need some good protein after a workout like that to reduce soreness, but the peanut butter is going to have to be it.

Maybe this is just my body's way of telling me that I've had enough to eat today and I don't really need anything else. Or maybe it's telling me that I overdid the weight lifting. Or maybe it was the artichoke dip I had at a work meeting today. Damn dip. I shouldn't be eating dip anyway. Bad dip.

So I haven't made any progress on my detox plan and I'm still not really sure what I think about doing it. I kind of want to do an initial push and lose a couple/three or five pounds quickly, but I'm also afraid I'll lose exercise momentum if I'm out of energy due to lack of calories, and right now that's the one thing I have going for me. What's really sad is that I'm still looking for that quick fix, that thing that will get me where I want to be. I know it just takes a lot of hard work and dedication. Blah blah blah. I'm doing it. I'm peppy. I'm excited. I'm on the wagon. Can't you tell?

Okay so maybe I'm not in that great mental place, but I've always heard that if you pretend, eventually it will come true. (Obviously someone out there said that much more eloquently than I did, but you get my drift) Anyway, that's what I'm doing. I'm pretending. And eventually I will be in that place. I will pretend until I get there.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sunday

Hey everyone. Sunday morning and I'm wishing the weekend wasn't flying by quite so quickly. Things have been going well. My lunch on Friday was cancelled, so I was incredibly excited. I ate a Lean Cuisine for lunch and everything was all good. By the end of the day I was so tired though, and I ended up skipping the gym. I also had a glass of white wine. Okay so things weren't great really. Maybe I shouldn't put these limits on myself. I know that if I don't set these goals, I won't have anything to shoot for. But it seems like I screw up even if I do set goals. So I'm not exactly sure what to do.

The good news is; I kept it to only a little wine and I went home and went to bed early so I could go on a bike ride yesterday. The boy and I were out on our ride for over 90 minutes and went about 18 miles. It was great and I feel awesome about that and I definitely think I made up for skipping the gym Friday. I'm also up early today so I can go to the gym and work off the french fries I ate last night. I stayed within my calorie limit but I just feel bad about eating them. I think I have serious guilt issues right now that I need to deal with.

I've been toying with the idea of doing a detox, maybe just for a couple of days or maybe even for longer. But I'm not sure what I'd do exactly and I'm not sure if its a good idea or not. I think it might help me get back on track, but I also think it might put me in a crappy mood and make my state of mind even worse. Anyone have any experience with detox? What did you guys do? For how long? Did it feel good? Was it worth it? Any advice would be appreciated.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Late For Work

But I want to post here so I have some accountability today. Weekends are always hardest for me, and it usually starts on Friday lunch at work. I have a lunch with a colleague today and won't be able to choose where we go, but I'm publicly saying here that I will make a good decision. I will not eat any chocolate from the receptionist candy jar. I will have a healthy snack. Then, instead of going to happy hour, I'm going to the gym after work and lifting weights.

The boy and I are going to have a nice evening inside and watch the hockey game, so hopefully I can do a good job with my eating meals. I hate that it's gotten to the point where I need to write out every single thing I'm going to do today, but I fear I'll fall off the wagon again if I don't "say it out loud" so to speak.

Thank you guys so much for your comments. I know I couldn't keep this up if it wasn't for you. Okay off to work, TGIF!

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Wednesday

Wednesday night check in. So far I'm doing good on all of my goals except the no sugar thing. It just isn't realistic for me. So I'm incorporating a 100 calorie snack pack of Chips Ahoy tonight. Okay and a few twizzlers today. Dammit. I actually think it's okay, especially if it helps keep me sane. Otherwise I'm doing well; vegetable at every meal and no alcohol, and I'm checking in here so that's good.

I still don't feel 100% about all of this, but I went to the trainer last night and he kicked my ass. In a good way though. He also reminded me of all of the accomplishments I've made so far. I'm such an active person now, and I do eat well for the most part. I know how to make really good decisions now. I can run for almost 40 minutes without stopping. I participate in charity events like the Roadless Ride, which I did on Friday morning and forgot to even tell you guys about! So things are going to be okay, it's just going to be a long road. And if this is ever going to work I'm going to have to have a better attitude. Right now I'm Debbie Downer all day long.

So the Roadless Ride was a series of 12 one hour long spin classes (I only did one) to benefit Brent's Place, a non-profit here in Denver that provides housing for kids with cancer who come to Denver for treatment. Such a great cause, and it was a great excuse to get my ass kicked at a 7 a.m. spin class. I have to tell you, it was pretty much the hardest spin class I've ever taken. I don't know if it was because I went early in the morning before work when usually I go later in the day, or if it was the instructor, who I've never had before but completely rocked. Either way it was a super tough class.

Unfortunately the Wednesday night class, which is what I usually attend, has been put on hiatus for the summer, so it looks like I'll be riding outside. Actually, that's a good thing now that I think about it. Well a good thing when it's nice, but of course today it's raining and icky outside. Tonight I opted to do an easy 40 minutes on the elliptical because I'm sore as hell from last night's weight session. Also a good thing. Oh my god I sound like a Martha St5wart. Yikes.

So yeah, I'm doing what I can. I'm working on it. I even cooked dinner tonight. I know I'm really boring right now but I'm trying to come up with some interesting topics to discuss. I promise!

Monday, May 01, 2006

Feh

I'm doing better I think. All goals have been made so far. I think I might have trouble with the no sugar thing, but I'm going to give it my best shot. I do know that I ate a shitload of fiber today and I'm sure I'm going to regret that tomorrow. Oh well. I'll survive. I had a salad for breakfast with the frosted mini wheats, a lean cus1ine for lunch, larabar for a snack, and salad with tempeh for dinner (chicken wasn't all the way defrosted). So today was good, lots of veggies, did my 35 minute run without stopping, and no sugar and no alcohol. I'm okay.

So why don't I feel okay? I guess one day on the wagon doesn't automatically make things all better. It shouldn't really, but I want it to. I guess the prospect of doing this day after day is just a little much to handle right now. Why can't I feel like I felt January 1? Or January 3? I'm pissed at myself for dragging this out for so long and I'm pissed at myself for bitching about it. I'm doing it right now, I'm doing everything I think I'm supposed to be doing, but I'm hating every minute of it. Yes it's only been a day. But I'm still hating it.

Sorry for the downer post, I don't know what the deal is. Maybe it's the alcohol I drank Saturday night. I guess this is why I'm cutting it out this week. Because it makes me sad and and unhappy. Anyway hopefully I'll be a little more peppy tomorrow.