Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Okay it is time to admit it, I am struggling. I do not want to come back here in two months, after the holidays are over, and have gained weight. Back on August 25th I "re-dedicated" myself to losing weight, specifically 17 lbs in the 17 weeks before my trip to Mexico, and it's time to take a hard look at what I've been doing since then. That day I weighed in at 176.6. Today I weighed 172.1. That means I've lost 4.5 lbs since I wrote that post 11 weeks ago. And I don't really even know how realistic that loss is because I tend to fluctuate so much based on how much salt/booze I eat and how big my meals are. So realistically, most of that weight is just water weight anyway.

I guess I'm just frustrated with myself because I was feeling great, on track and kicking ass, and over the past couple of weeks I have really let that slide and have not been focusing on my goals. And then last night, I came across Lucas' post about how difficult it can be to push through when you feel and look great (and by the way you look great if you're reading this lady!). Reading that post was sort of like a catalyst for me. As I read through the comments, I thought, this is me! This is the issue I am constantly struggling with.

I am a healthy, fit girl. I work out 4-5 times a week. I eat healthy foods. I feel good. BUT, on the other hand, I'm still overweight. I definitely have extra fat on my body, and it needs to go. And yes I'm fit, but I am by no means where I want to be. I can't run as fast or jump as high as I want to. And I'm pretty sure if Jillian saw me waffling like this, she'd tell me to get over  myself and tackle the issue at hand.

I guess what I'm saying is that although I want to be comfortable in my own skin, I don't want to get TOO comfortable. Because too comfortable leads to lax behavior, like pizza every Sunday night and beers during the Bronco game and then suddenly it will be Thanksgiving and Christmas and I'll have eaten everything in site and gained 15 lbs. I know my body and I know that is a very real possibility, and I will not let that happen this year.

Instead I, once again, am setting out my intentions here. I'm going to do the very best I can not to let the holidays overwhelm me. I'm going to limit my vino consumption, because that is constantly getting me in trouble. I'm going to get in those workouts 5 times a week and I am going to focus on training to get better for snowboarding season, which is rapidly approaching. I'm going to remove the excess sugar I've been consuming. I'm going to count my calories, and I'm going to stick to my limits. I'm not going to ruin five days of healthy behavior with two days of excess. NOT GONNA DO IT.

On that note, I am heading to the gym. Time to stop talking about it and actually do it. :)

1 comment:

Jess said...

Good luck! I struggle with this too. I always want to lose MORE MORE MORE. I'm glad you're doing things to make your goals happen!