Feeling much better, but still definitely not 100%. The coughing and lack of air to breathe continues, but like I said, I'm getting better. I went back to work today and it was hard. In total I had six days off, what with the Thanksgiving holiday and the weekend and then the staying home sick. I'm run down and tired, and my body just needs love.
So that's what I'm trying to give it. I've been eating well (okay well better than I had been, of course minus my sister's birthday dinner last night, more on that later). I'm going back to the gym tomorrow after work; I'm actually rescheduling the session with the trainer. I'm excited to go back; it's amazing how much I miss working out. Hopefully he'll go easy on me since he knows I've been sick. I'm super excited to see the new moves he's going to show me.
So The Biggest Loser. I had to TiVo it since we went to P.F. Chang's for dinner last night for my little sister's birthday. She's 14. Wow. I got the kung pao chicken with brown rice and only ate about half of it, so I thought I did okay. Obviously I know Chinese food isn't great, but at least it's white meat chicken without too much sauce on it. Then of course I went back to my parents house and had a giant piece of yellow cake with chocolate frosting. Nice work.
Okay, so I'm allowed to indulge once in a while, but the problem is, it hasn't just been once in a while. It's more like all the time. And after watching TBL, I was floored. So happy and excited for those people; yet so sad and ashamed that I can't commit to doing the same thing. I found myself with a perma-grin, just smiling from ear to ear watching Suzy jump up and down. She was so happy and content, and it just showed. She looked amazing. They all did. I was kind of bummed that Matt won because to be honest, I've been slightly annoyed with him throughout the show, but he really did deserve it. To lose 185 pounds is an amazing feat. I just want to lose 50.
One thing that did come out of last night's cake fiasco was the desire and motivation to do more. To eat better and to work out and to just take better care of myself. So tonight I'm making a WW recipe I found for six points, I'm skipping dessert, and I'm going to bed early. Tomorrow I'm eating a healthy breakfast, lunch, and dinner, then going to go meet with the trainer. I'm pumped.