Weigh-In Day

Official weigh-in 185.5. Down 1 lb this week. I think it would have been more, but I did have the monthly visitor yesterday and I lifted weights for the first time in a couple of weeks, so my muscles may be holding some water. Or I may have only lost 1 lb. Which is fine. I've been back on track 4 weeks now though, and I guess I'm starting to get impatient. Last year my lowest weight was 173, and I want to be there now. Like I said last week though, I know this is a slow process and I just need to focus on the fact that I am losing at a healthy rate.

I also said last week that I wanted to be bursting at the gills with veggies, and I didn't really accomplish that goal. I think that will be an ongoing goal for the rest of my life, if I'm being honest. I'm not feeling quite as whiny today as I was yesterday, but I guess I'm still kind of cranky. It's also the beginning of the weekend, and the weekend and my lack of food control over the weekend scares me.

It's an ongoing conflict in my head. Am I going to look back on my 20's and say, "Why was I fat, why didn't I take care of this sooner?" Or am I going to say "Wow, I was so concerned about my weight that I didn't go out and have fun with my friends. Instead I sat at home and worried about what my next meal was going to be." It's just about finding that happy medium, where I'm taking care of myself, losing weight and becoming my future me, but still doing the things that my friends do and going out to restaurants and happy hours and being social. It's hard. Okay I guess I am being whiny.